Posts by Tiffany McLain
I Voted for Trump: A Few Words on the Psychology of Splitting
I am a biracial, vagina-toting, west-coast, liberal-leaning psychotherapist. I am also Trump. I consumed him on social media. I gave him a decent amount of space in my mind. I grew excited – viscerally – when he shocked me. I cast my vote for him. Stop reading. Take a moment. Breathe. How you feelin’? Here’s…
Diversity in Tech: The Psychological Toll of Being Underrepresented
A “Unicorn.” This is how Gail* describes herself. “I was groomed for this type of work.” Gail’s parents were in tech long before tech was a thing. She describes that her mother and father made sure she was “well-spoken” and highly educated. She now works as a Data Infrastructure Engineer at a hot startup in…
To Have or Have Not: Regretting the Child Choice
“I don’t think I would… No. Sometimes, I do.” Olivia,* was silent for a long moment. It hung between us, this silence. Then, finally, “If I could wave a magic wand and make this all go away, I would.” Were she talking about kidney stones, or credit card debt, we would all nod along, reassured…
Why Silence in Therapy is Good
If you were to meet me at a party, you might describe me as rambunctious, animated and a little irreverent. I like my coffee black and I like my humor crass. So, it may surprise you to know that once I don my therapist scarf (or fingerless gloves, as may be the case), I tend…
How to Survive Your In-Laws During the Holidays
You needn’t look far to find examples of loving couples who become completely unraveled over the mere mention of spending time with the in-laws. Though the ding-dong of the in-law’s doorbell may sound like a relationship death knell, there are ways to survive (and even have fun…?) when visiting your partner’s family this holiday season.…
Three Reasons Why Researchers of “Millennials” Can Kiss my Multi-Ethnic Ass.
The term “Millennials” has become all the rage since Neil Howe and William Strauss first coined it in 1991. This Millennial Generation, consisting of all of those born roughly between 1982 and 2004, have been poked, prodded, theorized and hypothesized about ad nauseum. From being our civic-minded saviors to our narcissistic downfall, overly coddled children…
How Much Should I Pay For Therapy?
Let’s be real. Money is, well… complicated. Dread. Shame. Desperation. Terror. Guilt. Frustration. Desire. Envy. These are just a few of the feelings that overtake us when considering our financial situation. None of us are immune to the emotional complexities that money stirs up. If you are in a relationship with another human being, money…
Do Good or Make Money: Which Side are YOU on?
For those of us in the helping professions – therapists, social workers, psychologists – there is a split that divides us. It goes something like this: There are those of us who are in the field to “help people” and those of us who are just here to “make money.” Or at least that’s the…
Do Black Lives Matter?: An Analysis of the Hit Show “Fear the Walking Dead”
I sat down to watch the first episode of the thrilling new zombie apocalypse show Fear the Walking Dead, by the creators of The Walking Dead. This follow-up series promised to rectify all the wrongs that were committed in the original. For the three of you who are unfamiliar with the original show, stop now, and…
A Deeper Look into Addyi (“Female Viagra”) and the Cause of Low Libido.
By now you have certainly heard of Addyi the pill – just approved by the F.D.A. -that promises to increase a woman’s sexual desire. Initially, I was skeptical. In all my years, talking to friends, seeing clients in private practice, being, ya know, a human being, I have yet to encounter a single woman who…
First Comes Love, Then Comes…CELIBACY?! Reigniting a Sexless Marriage.
Tyler and Sam describe themselves as best friends. They value personal freedom, honest communication, happy hours and an occasional home-spun puppet show. After six years together, they feel closer than ever. There’s just one problem: They don’t have sex. Okay, they do have sex, but it is an awkward, drunken event that may occur three…
When Ashley Madison Beckons: What To Do in an Age when an Affair is Just a Click Away.
I was recently introduced to Ashley Madison. She just happens to be the dating site of choice for all of your extramarital liaisons. According to Noel Biderman, the founder and CEO, 35,000 people sign up for AM each day, and 120 million people visit the site each month. Research shows that 54% of women and…