Posts Tagged ‘Mindfulness’
Sharing the Road: how driving keeps us emotionally distant from one another
When I was 14 ½ I signed up for driver’s ed, just barely old enough to take the class. The day I turned 15 I passed my permit test. The week I turned 16 I took my behind-the-wheel test. Anxious to get in the beat-down old hunk of steel my older brother so generously handed…
Self-compassion just might save your life
I had an experience recently which re-affirmed for me that self-compassion is probably the most powerful tool I have. Some might wonder how that could be true. While more people are becoming aware of the importance of self-compassion in mental health and well-being, it still runs counter to the values of the prevailing mainstream culture…
Trust your struggle*: mindfulness for uncertain times
A mindful conundrum An op-ed piece recently came out in the New York Times that took a critical look at the booming mindfulness craze. You might’ve noticed mindfulness is everywhere lately, touted as the next big thing (even though it is in fact, ancient). The piece skeptically highlights the appropriation of mindfulness toward improprietous ends…
How to find answers in your feelings
As a therapist, I will tell you a big secret – the most important question I ask is “How did that make you feel?” Yeah—a running joke for we’ve all heard—all you have to do is say that phrase on repeat to be a therapist. But in practice it is the hardest question for most…
Fog and Mood: everyday invitations to deeper feeling
“The weather and my mood have little connection. I have my foggy and my fine days within me; my prosperity or misfortune has little to do with the matter.” —Blaise Pascal “Everything that irritates us about others can lead to an understanding of ourselves.’ —Carl Jung The fog of a mood San Francisco’s foghorns were…
Self-compassion in five words
Self-compassion is at the heart of my personal and professional life, and when people ask me how it got there, I usually say that it was through my meditation practice. It’s true that sitting for years on a consistent basis (when I’m tired, anxious, joyful, frustrated and everything else) showed me a lot about the…
How do we stop self sabotaging?
“…a self sabotaging story line is being formed and if the child is experiencing emotional pain they will hard wire an adaptive solution, usually not the wisest option from an adult’s perspective, to keep the psychological pain at bay – buried deep down in a cavernous mine of twists and turns, the cart racing on its…
Working With Your Life
“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself” -Andy Warhol Once, a few decades ago, a meditation teacher I knew talked of the importance of ‘working with your life’. He said it casually, off-handedly, in the way that he said most everything. This from a guy who had been…
Deconstructing Mindfulness
Mindfulness is everywhere nowadays. Like so much else in American life, it’s become a commodity, a product. Not long ago I was looking over the 2013 course listings for an East Coast conference center and saw 19 courses being offered with the word mindfulness in the title. And that’s not counting the ones with mindfulness’s…
Zen Brain
“Zen Brain comes from a perspective of intersecting worlds of neuroscience and spiritual practice. What I heard were repeated metaphors of that hyper-connectivity of brain, mind, science as lived experience. By extension, the lessons of neuroscience are unfolding in our time, helping to redefine our minds, our world.” -Peter Goetz In February I participated in…
What is Awake and Aware Right in the Middle of This Experience?
What is awake and aware right in the middle of this experience? Let’s say it’s a tinge of sadness you’re experiencing. Letting that be just as it is, neither turning the volume on it up nor down, inquire. Then just really feel it consciously, from that non-locatable center. When fully inspected, this question can be…
Dialectical Cognitive Therapy
You may or may not have heard of dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT). In a nutshell, this is a psychotherapeutic modality focusing on behaviors that are not helpful in getting one’s needs met in relationships and life at large and are often destructive. My sense is that the focus in this form of therapy is not the…