PLAYING
Let Sex Bring You Closer
Would it surprise you to know that as a Sex Therapist I see fewer clients who are selfish lovers and many more that are too selfless? And by that I mean that they are paying attention to a heck of a lot of things, but not so much to themselves. For most of us, when…
A Beginner’s Guide to Mindfulness (with flow chart!)
A blank stare, a furrowed brow and a “huh?” is the most accurate description of my introduction to mindfulness. At that time it was still mostly relegated to the hippy-dippy set and the Boston hospital where Jon Kabat-Zinn was scientifically testing its efficacy. Typically defined as paying attention to our thoughts and feelings without judging…
The Post-It Note Method – A Truly Simple Way to Discover your Passion
I want to go public with an idea of mine that I jokingly call the Post-It Note Method. (I say “jokingly” because it sounds patented, which is not at all my style). The Post-It Note Method is a tool to help us find out why we’re here, alive, on planet Earth. It’s a way to…
How Music helps your Brain, Your Heart, and Your Recovery
Have you ever had a song come on the radio that suddenly transported you somewhere? A alcoholic friend of mine in recovery takes it as a “sign” whenever she hears the song from the movie Frozen “Let it Go,” reminding her that she is not in control and that is a good thing. Another woman…
Is Sex Therapy for You?
The great majority of my psychotherapy clients, regardless of whether or not they come to see me as individuals or couples, are experiencing difficulties with relationships. And in many instances, when I inquire (and because I’m a certified sex therapist in addition to a psychotherapist), I find that people are not happy with their sex…
Sexual Satisfaction: Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?
A few years ago, I had a dirty little secret. I was disconnected with my sexuality. Sure, I had gotten boudoir photos for my husband for his birthday. And we went to Burning Man where I wore sexy costumes. I didn’t talk to friends about how I was actually feeling underneath the image I…
Harm Reduction: Making Way for Curiosity About Your Drug/Alcohol Use
I haven’t been writing as many articles recently. I guess it’s because I’ve been spending my free time in bars. Ok, I realize that was a misleading statement. I have a new podcast, A Therapist Walks Into a Bar, for which I interview random people in bars about all kinds of human issues and then…
David Bowie and Embracing Weirdness in Therapy
David Bowie died last week, at the age of 69, after living with cancer for 18 months. It hit me harder than I had expected. I think part of my grief came from shock and disbelief, since a general consensus among my friends is that none of us believed David Bowie could ever die. He…
Post-Holiday Blues? Take Your Vacation Back to Your Regularly Scheduled Life
Every moment of presence is a vacation in the middle of our life. Try it! You may live a vacation!